WHY FOOD SHOULD BE YOUR LOVER, NOT YOUR FRENEMY.
We’ve all heard the whispers — keto, paleo, intermittent fasting — diets that promise us not just weight loss but a completely transformed life. For many, diet culture becomes a constant companion, quietly dictating food choices, instilling guilt when we indulge, and making us feel like food is something to be controlled, managed, and feared. But what if I told you that it didn’t have to be this way? What if food wasn’t a foe to be conquered but a partner to be cherished, nurtured, and enjoyed?
For years, my relationship with food was toxic. I meticulously counted calories, cut out carbs, and labelled foods as either “good” or “bad.” My self-worth became entangled with with the digits on the scale, and I lived in a constant state of anxiety around food. Social gatherings became stressful events, as I mentally calculated the “damage” from every meal, and treats were followed by feelings of guilt and shame. Diet culture had convinced me that controlling my food intake would somehow grant me control over my life.
But somewhere along the way, I began to question this narrative. Why should I be at war with something as essential as food? Why should I deny myself the pleasure and nourishment that food offers? After all, food is more than fuel; it is memory; culture and connection. Whether it’s the smell of freshly cooked biryani wafting through the house or the warmth of homemade dal and roti on a rainy evening, food has the power to comfort, to heal, and to bring people together.
I vividly remember the moment I decided to break up with my diet. I was sitting at a family gathering, surrounded by my favorite dishes — samosas, jalebis, pav bhaji — and instead of enjoying the experience, I was calculating how many minutes on the treadmill it would take to “earn” each bite. That’s when it hit me: I wasn’t truly living. I was trapped in a cycle of deprivation, fear and obsession, all in the name of of an idealized version of health that wasn’t even mine. It was time to stop treating food like an enemy and start embracing it as something that could bring joy, not just guilt.
When I finally let go of diet culture, it was like a weight lifted off my shoulders. Instead of seeing food as a battleground, I started seeing it for what it really is — something to be savored, celebrated, and enjoyed. I learned to listen to my body rather than the latest diet trend. I stopped categorizing foods as “good” or “bad” and instead focused on how they made me feel. And you know they made me feel. And you know what I discovered? When you stop trying to control everything, your body naturally finds its balance. You eat when you’re hungry, you stop, when you’re full, and you give yourself permission to enjoy all kinds of foods without guilt.
THE DIET CULTURE:
One of the greatest realizations was that food isn’t the problem — it’s the rigid rules and expectations we place around it. Diet culture thrives on the notion that there is one right way to eat, one right way to look, and one right way to live. It tells us that our worth is tied to our appearance, that smaller bodies are better bodies, and that we must constantly strive for perfection. But the truth is, health and happiness don’t come from restriction or deprivation. They come from balance, freedom, and self-acceptance. Letting go of diet culture doesn’t mean letting go of health. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. True health is about more than just weight or appearance. It’s about feeling good in your body, having energy, and nourishing yourself in a way that supports your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. And yes, that includes enjoying your favorite foods without shame or guilt.
For me, food became a source of pleasure again. I rediscovered the joy of cooking without worrying about calories or macros. I started savoring my morning chai(tea) without counting the sugar, indulging in dessert when I felt like it, and appreciating the richness of traditional dishes that I had once avoided in the name of “health.” And the most surprising part? My body didn’t fall apart. In fact, it flourished. I had more energy, felt more in tune with my body, and was happier than I had been in years.
Breaking up with diet culture also opened my eyes to the ways in which food connects us. Food is woven into the fabric of our daily lives, our celebrations, and our rituals. It is how we show love, care, and hospitality. Whether it’s sharing a meal with family or cooking for friends, food has always been a way for us to bond and create memories. By letting go of restrictive eating, I was able to fully participate in these moments again, without the cloud of guilt hanging over me. Of course, this journey isn’t always easy. Diet culture is deeply ingrained in our society, and its messages are hard to escape.
We’re constantly bombarded with images of “perfect” bodies, promises of quick fixes, and the idea that we must control our food intake to be worthy or successful. But here’s the thing: you are enough, exactly as you are. Your worth is not tied to what you eat or how you look. You don’t need to punish yourself with restrictive diets or endless hours of exercise to be healthy or happy.
If you’ve spent years caught in the trap of diet culture, it might feel daunting to let go, but trust me. it’s worth it. Breaking up with your diet doesn’t mean giving up on health or self-care. It means redefining those things in a way that works for you. It means learning to trust your body, honoring your hunger, and allowing yourself to enjoy food without guilt. It means embracing balance, flexibility, and freedom — because food should be a source of nourishment and joy, not stress and anxiety.
