More women are not just breaking the silence around it but also helping others navigate this turbulent period in their lives.
“Inner circle meet” of the Confident Queens Club, (CQC), a paid support group for 400-odd women going through menopause and perimenopause (the 3-10 year phase before the last period). The women have never met each other but they freely discuss hot flushes and dipping energy levels, loss of libido and hair fall, troublesome teens and distant husbands. “Self-care is not selfish.”
Indian women usually remain tight-lipped about the subject as talking about menstruation, and therefore menopause is still taboo and many also find it embrassing to admit they are growing older. “Ageing is still a big deal. Women still want to show that they are young, so they hesitate to talk about menopause.”
“Tapping into one’s sisterhood” is the best way to sail through menopause. “Our mothers went through menopause very quietly but we don’t need to do that. There are solutions like combination therapy available now.”
A health platform and app, says more than 55,000 women have enrolled in their menopause management programs. These were started a couple of years ago by software engineer, Swathi Kulkarni and gynaecologist Dr Ameya Kanakiya as they felt there was no conversation around menopause and no non-medical support. “When women go to meet their family doctor or gynaecologist, they are told ‘bear kar lo, aisa hota hai’ (bear it, this happens). But perimenopause lasts for three to 10 years. Why should we bear it? Some women even end up quitting work.” Her own health deteriorate when she entered perimenopause at 35. Elda Health offers a range of packages which include diagnostic tests, a doctor consultation, customized diet plans, yoga sessions, and access to Elda Club where they connect with peers.
A woman called Mikkilineni, thought of coaching women facing menopause after losing two years of her life and ruining her relationship with her 18-year old son because of menopause. “I would get panic attacks, and I would yell at him when he came home late, not realizing that my reactions were actually influenced by the hormonal changes.” Members of her CQC attend two live classes every week on topics such as brain and bone health. They are also connected via a Telegram group where members share pictures of their daily plates, vent about their struggles, and share success stories. Older members give pep talks to new entrants who are feeling low.
“Doctors can just give us pills but friends give us the power to overcome the challenges we face.” It is easier to turn to CQC friends as other people frown upon bringing up “ladies problems” in public. Diet, exercise, and meditation plan helped her shed weight and handle situations with a smile rather than fury.
Women who have triumphed over menopause symptoms are also helping others in the same boat. “Doctors would simply ask me to stop stressing and prescribe sleeping pills.” “Now I speak to at least 100 women daily and guide them. They don’t have to suffer like me.”
