Quackery could be out for a duck. Last Saturday, new IMA president Dilip Bhanushali told that he was against ‘mixopathy menance’ which leaves patients ‘at the mercy of the ill-equipped if not absolutely untrained.’ ‘We are not against ayurveda, homeopathy or other sciences…. What we oppose is mixing them.’ Mercifully he cannot bar mixology, the trendy science dispensed by specialist movers and cocktail-shakers. But confused doctors could still reach for cocktail cabinet instead of medicine cabinet There’s much in common. ‘Shots’ can be typhoid and tequila. Like Bond’s martini mundane, medicine bottles must be ‘shaken not stirred.’
Rusty Nail causes both tetanus and St .Partrick’s Day bacchanalia. Planters Punch is bruise-y at boozy tea-estate parties. Unwanted pregnancy could be traced to Hanky Panky, made of sweet vermouth and bitter Italian digestivo Fernet-Branca. Less serious fall-out is feared from mere Flirtini, the vodka-champagne-pineapple juice rave on Sex and the City. Penicillin is Scotch-based but its ginger; honey syrup, fresh lemon juice could cure your cough. Or you might prefer the rum-based Painkiller from British Virgin Islands.
Here are the mixology prescriptions:
- Anemia — Bloody Mary.
- Fractured elbow — SIngapore Sling.
- Hip Surgery — Screwdriver.
- Gastro-intestinal tract stuff — G & T
- Acid reflux — Whiskey Sour.
- Global travel sickness — Cosmopolitan
- Flagging male libido — Margarita
- Female ditto — Man-hattan
Unsympathetic doctors will dismiss the clinic regular as a “Suffering Bastard” — cognac/brandy and fresh lime juice topped up with ginger beer. Of course, sham-ache is Champagne.
HOW FUNNY IS IT???
